Let silence work

After someone answers, wait. Count three in your head before you speak. Often the second part of an answer, the part that matters, comes after a pause.

Older people often remember slowly, and younger people often fill pauses quickly. If you are the younger one, the pause is your job.

Anyone can pass on a question. Say so at the start: "If a question is not one you want, just say pass." A question someone can refuse is a question they can answer truthfully.